give thanks

In true Christin fashion, I couldn’t let Thanksgiving just breeze by without a hint of sarcasm. Let’s face it, there are a lot of things that are good to have but downright annoying and even inconvenient. For those things, let us give thanks.

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1. I am thankful for the MTA because without them I might actually get to work at the same time everyday. Thank you for adhering to an actual service schedule. #assholes
2. I am thankful for nail polish that chips within a week so that I never have to fully commit to a nail color.
3. I am thankful for a dishwasher because without one, I might never have to unload it.
4. I am thankful for the super powered radiator in the building that heats our apartment to the temperature of a tropical rainforest. #itstoohot
5. I am thankful for the TSA employee that will pat me down tomorrow because I refuse to go through a body scanner that has not been fully tested.
6. I am thankful that everyone I know is getting knocked up and/or married so that my newsfeed on facebook may never be interesting.
7. I am thankful for instagram because, let’s face it, no one’s life is as cool as it is on instagram.
8. I am thankful for text messaging because who can be bothered to talk on the phone?
9. I am thankful for laundry in the basement because you always get a good arm workout in carrying three weeks worth of laundry around.
10. I am thankful for organic candy because eating copious amounts sugar has never seemed more healthy.